I suffered two simultaneous injuries during a one day game for Kensington's Adelaide Turf team. First I hurt my hand while playing a shot, then Steve Alexander called me through for an ambitious two and I tore my driver in the process. It later turned out that I had snapped the tendon that controls the little finger in my right hand which meant I spent 4 weeks in a plaster cast. If my team mates knew how bad the injury was I'm sure they wouldn't have laughed quite as hard... Who am I? Clue: I am
During premiership celebrations, I climbed up and was hanging off the air conditioner in the clubrooms. I managed to pull it out of the ceiling and it landed on top of my head. Still, I didn't spill a single drop of bundy. Who am I?
I was playing a B Grade game and Andrew Rumbelow was bowling. He moved me into an extremely short cover position and then bowled the juiciest half volley of all time. I was struck a very painful blow in the shins. There was a ripple of laughter around the ground as I hobbled in circles around the infield and a bruise came up straight away. A few weeks later the bruise was still there so I went to the doctor. He told me that the bruise was "like a tattoo" and would be permanent. Who am I?
I was the last Kensington player to hit a six on Kensington Oval, before the club moved to Parkinson Oval. Who am I?
I was known as the "King of the no balls." One day at training at the Pembroke nets I bowled a barrage of bouncers at Shaun Seigert from 18 yards. Seigs was unimpressed and would pick up the ball, throw it in the air and belt it out of the net. I also famously went to the pub with Sanjay Singh one day during a B Grade game at Glenelg Oval. Who am I?
Highlight to reveal answer >>>Steve O'Brien
At a club function I tried to do an impersonation of John Lee by standing on a bar stool. I lost my balance and fell, injuring my shoulder which put me out for the last half of the cricket season. Who am I?
Highlight to reveal answer >>>Jason Morgan
After heavy rains on Friday I told my players not to worry about going out to Tea Tree Gully on the Saturday as it would definitely be washed out. Unfortunately late on the Friday, the Gullies curator managed to wade through the mud and scrawl a couple of white lines at each end of the pitch. This meant that the game could only officially be called off by the umpires on the Saturday. Come game time Saturday, TTG was the only team there so I became the only senior captain in Kensington's history to lose a game by forfeit. Who am I?
Highlight to reveal answer >>>Ian Rice
. Late on a Thursday night after a few drinks at the clubrooms, I challenged our club's major sponsor - David Harford - to a sprint race in the dark on Parkinson Oval. Unfortunately I not only lost the race but tore my hamstring in the process. Who am I?
Highlight to reveal answer >>>Sam Parkinson
. I was batting in a C Grade game on Colonel waite Oval and was dismissed in the 20's - a regular occurrence. I was very frustrated as made my way off the ground and started launching gear towards my cricket bag from several metres away. First gloves, then bat, then helmet... the helmet bounced over my cricket bag and settled on the crest of the slope for several seconds, before slowly gathering speed and rolling into the creek. This prompted skipper Geoffrey Black to point out, "Error of judgement, that." Who am I?
Highlight to reveal answer >>>Nick Beagley
. I was playing C Grade at Colonel Waite. We were fielding and the ball got hit into the pond. Skipper Geoff Black convinced me to disrobe from my whites and wade in to get it. "Nah, you'll be right - in you go. It's character building. We've all had to do it over the years." Who am I?
Highlight to reveal answer >>>Darcy Bradmore
. In a C Grade game at Colonel Waite I was fielding down at fine leg. The TTG batter played a standard leg glance straight to me and took off for a single. On turning for two he noticed that I was being a little casual and didn't yet have the ball in hand so he charged back for the second. My throw sailed over the head of the keeper, the alert cover fielder thankfully preventing overthrows. I thus became the only man in history to allow a two to fine leg on Colonel Waite. Who am I?
Highlight to reveal answer >>>Geoffrey Black
I am a former fast(ish) opening bowler. I once injured my shoulder quite badly, doing a vigorous fist pump while celebrating a wicket. I was out for several months with the injury. Who am I?
Highlight to reveal answer >>>James Campbell
I was captain of the Norwood High School open knockout cricket team and was charged with the responsibility of selecting the final XI. I controversially left out future premiership team mate and Kensington legend, Jamie Panelli. There is still tension between the pair of us over this. Who am I?
Highlight to reveal answer >>>John Palmer
I had a habit of kicking the bowler's end stumps over in disgust after delivering a bad ball and would then calmly set them up again, which bemused the umpries no end. Who am I?
Highlight to reveal answer >>>Jamie McPhee
During premiership celebrations I was out late at night with the team and we were hopping from venue to venue in town. As we became more and more inebriated we were finding it difficult to gain entry. One over-zealous bouncer simply would not budge, no matter how humorous I was or how many test match tickets I offered him. No amount of sweet-talking could turn him around so as a last resort I administered a "Chinese burn." It didn't work and the whole team was sent packing. Who am I?
Highlight to reveal answer >>>Dean Waugh
I was playing in a late season must-win B Grade game at Parkinson Oval. On Day 2 the wicket was quite wet and the umpires and opposition captain were reluctant to play. Skipper John Porter was in their ear all morning and finally was able to talk them in to a delayed start. A win would keep our finals hopes alive. During the delay a few of us were kicking the football around. I drifted onto the pitch square and tried to execute a trademark booming drop punt. I ended up flat on my back and took out a skid mark a metre long, right in front of the umpires. The umpires realised that the square was much too wet after all and immediately called game over. Needless to say, Ports was apoplectic with rage and the vein came out straight away. Who am I?
Highlight to reveal answer >>>Craig "Crackles" McShane
I was a right arm fast bowler. On my A Grade debut I steamed in for my first ball and bowled a no ball. Second ball I came charging in again but pulled my hamstring and was out for the game. So I finished my first game with the bowling figures of 0.0 overs 0/1. Who am ?
Highlight to reveal answer >>>Kyle Bowes
We were playing a one day game down at Bice Oval. The crowd in front of the social club were drinking heavily and becoming increasingly boisterous throughout the day. I was fielding in front of them and had been copping plenty. At one stage a high ball got hit over my head. I ran back towards the boundary and took the catch just inside the boundary, right in front of the social club. Before running off to celebrate with my team mates I gave the crowd the finger which incited them further. The club later received an official letter from Southern District CC saying that I was “not welcome back at Bice Oval.” Who am I?
Highlight to reveal answer >>>Jamie McPhee
22. We were playing at Parkinson Oval and I was bowling. The batter Justin Ifould scooped a catch to mid on but the umpire somehow thought it was a bump ball. I was furious. Shortly after, Ifould was at the non-striker’s end. The batter hit the ball just wide of the pitch and they thought about a run. I raced over towards the ball and - still angry about the bump ball - shoved Ifould out of the way, then threw the stumps down at the bowler’s end and he was out. Needless to say, Ifould was not happy. After the game I bumped into him in the car park and offered to buy him a beer and have a chat about what had happened on the ground. “I’ll never have a beer with you, you old ****” he replied. Who am I?
Highlight to reveal answer >>>Andrew Rumbelow
I was playing an A Grade one dayer at University Oval in the days where we played 12 players, with one player not batting. Dean Waugh couldn’t decide whether Mark Barber or myself should bat at No 11 in the run chase. He suggested we go rock, paper, scissors to decide which one of us would bat. I won and went on to make a crucial 21 not out in an amazing 85 run partnership for the last wicket with Jamie Panelli. We won the game in the last over and went on to make the grand final. Who am I?
Highlight to reveal answer >>>Justin "Yup" Neumann
We were playing a D Grade game on Colonel Waite Oval and I was batting at number six. I was very excited as I had a special weapon – a cleanskin bat that I’d stuck a picture of a scantily clad girl to the front of. Captain Andrew Faulkner took an immediate disliking to it and told me that I couldn’t bat with it. After much arguing I went out to bat with my old second bat. I made a golden duck and on returning to the sidelines threw the second bat into the creek. Who am I?
Highlight to reveal answer >>>Jack Flynn
We bowled first in an A Grade game on a juicy Parkinson Oval strip. Andrew Watson and David Clarke were wreaking havoc and we had Port Adelaide in deep trouble at 9/21. The last pair slogged a few runs and they managed to get to 50. Mark Harrity and Brad Wigney came out breathing fire and the wickets began to tumble. I was at the top of the order and batted through the carnage, watching my partners disappear at the other end. I was wearing balls on the body, playing and missing regularly and couldn’t score. We reached 9/45 and I was still on zero. Finally I got off the mark with a cut shot over point for six to win the game. Who am I?
Highlight to reveal answer >>>Gary Wright
I drove into the Kensington car park to watch my son, who was playing in a game on Parkinson Oval. I was circling around looking for a park when I realised that he was bowling. I watched him bowl one delivery and got distracted, crashing my Bentley into the light pole (which as a result has stopped working). Who Am I?
Highlight to reveal answer >>>Dim Georgiadis
We were playing West Torrens at Kings Reserve. We had made 400+ on the first day and were heading for an easy win on Day 2. Captain Andrew Rumbelow approached their skipper and they agreed that they would set up a run chase rather than let the game drift on. The agreement was that West Torrens would gifted a few quick runs then Rumbles would declare at 0/0 and set up a fourth innings run chase. Rumbles brought on a couple of part timers who bowled a series of no balls, full tosses and long hops. One bowler had the figures of 2 overs 0/44, the other 2 overs 0/42.
This presented James Pyke with the softest hundred in grade history. We went on to miss the outright by one wicket and Rumbles received a please explain from SACA for trying to doctor a result. Who were the two bowlers used?
Highlight to reveal answers >>>Shaun Seigert and Jamie Siddons
Who said, "the only reason I play cricket is for washouts, the bye and Mad Monday."
Highlight to reveal answers >>>Jason Morgan
I was skipper of the Kensington C Grade team. Our last minor round game was against Adelaide at Colonel Waite Oval. We bowled them out halfway through Day 2 to win the game and secure top spot on the ladder. In those days you could call off the final match of the season early if the result was decided, however with a semi-final the next week I was keen for our batters to get a bit of time in the middle. Plus Adelaide had been stinking blokes throughout the whole game, in typical fashion. The afternoon wore on and the Adelaide fielders were getting increasingly abusive about being forced to stay out there. Their season was over and they kept looking over in my direction to see if I was going to pull stumps early. 4 o’clock came and went, drinks came and went… finally at about 5 o’clock I trotted out to their skipper in the slips cordon and told him “We’ll be batting until 6 o’clock” which triggered another torrent of abuse.
Highlight to reveal answers >>>Geoff Black